Reality and Fiction

They make a lot of medical dramas for tv these days. Well, not just these days, but since forever, actually. I remember watching ER when I was a child, and then watching Grey’s Anatomy. They make a lot of series about working as a doctor or being an intern, but I’ve yet to see a TV show about studying medicine, since it’s a lot more relevant to me at the moment. The shows they make, they’re not really that realistic. I’d like to see something actually relatable.

Maybe I feel like this because I’m usually so busy with premed-school that I have a really hard time making new friends, and being an exchange student only makes it harder. I often feel lonely in my dorm, even when my roommate is in. She’s nice, but we don’t have anything in common other than school. Plus, I don’t think she’s that academically inclined, or cares about getting good grades or learning anything. She often goes partying and comes home after midnight smelling like alcohol, I don’t know how she even got passing grades, but I’m not here to judge. It’s just that I have a lot more at stake.

Keeping in touch with my friends and family is really helpful. They give me strength and remind me of my goal and what I’m doing here. I want to have a bright future, so what if I have a hard time fitting in. My older sister often says that there must be someone who feels just as lonely and lost as I do, we just need to find each other. If more people were more open about feeling lonely, the world would be a better place.

Loneliness is a normal part of life. I’m learning to accept it. It won’t always be like this, I know. At first I tried to distract myself by being busy and studying harder, but I realized that this wasn’t the solution, I became overworked and overwhelmed. It’s like when you have to prevent a water heater from overheating proof: https://tanklesscenter.net/prevent-overheating – it will get damaged if you don’t do something. Similarly, I felt ‘overheated’ from all my excessive efforts, which, to be honest, weren’t necessary, I was doing just fine before.

I was thinking about trying to get some hobbies or join some clubs, and maybe meet some people that way, through shared interests. When I was in high school I liked dancing, so maybe I should find a dancing studio? I don’t know. We’ll see!